I found this Vespa ad funny:

This is ALA's (American Library Association) list of The 100 Most Frequently Challenged Books of 1990–2000, in honor of Banned Books Week 2004. It baffled me a bit when I came across it at first, but now, I just think I've found a good shopping list for the bookstore.

Scary Stories (Series) by Alvin Schwartz
Daddy’s Roommate by Michael Willhoite
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling
Forever by Judy Blume
Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
Alice (Series) by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman
My Brother Sam is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
The Giver by Lois Lowry
It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris
Goosebumps (Series) by R.L. Stine
A Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Newton Peck
The Color Purple by Alice Walker
Sex by Madonna
Earth’s Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel
The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle
Go Ask Alice by Anonymous
Fallen Angels by Walter Dean Myers
In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
The Stupids (Series) by Harry Allard
The Witches by Roald Dahl
The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein
Anastasia Krupnik (Series) by Lois Lowry
The Goats by Brock Cole
Kaffir Boy by Mark Mathabane
Blubber by Judy Blume
Killing Mr. Griffin by Lois Duncan
Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam
We All Fall Down by Robert Cormier
Final Exit by Derek Humphry
The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood
Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George
The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Girls: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Daughters by Lynda Madaras
To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
Beloved by Toni Morrison
The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton
The Pigman by Paul Zindel
Bumps in the Night by Harry Allard
Deenie by Judy Blume
Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes
Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden
The Boy Who Lost His Face by Louis Sachar
Cross Your Fingers, Spit in Your Hat by Alvin Schwartz
A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein
Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)
Asking About Sex and Growing Up by Joanna Cole
Cujo by Stephen King
James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
The Anarchist Cookbook by William Powell
Boys and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
Ordinary People by Judith Guest
American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Boys: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Sons by Lynda Madaras
Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume
Crazy Lady by Jane Conly
Athletic Shorts by Chris Crutcher
Fade by Robert Cormier
Guess What? by Mem Fox
The House of Spirits by Isabel Allende
The Face on the Milk Carton by Caroline Cooney
Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
Lord of the Flies by William Golding
Native Son by Richard Wright
Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women’s Fantasies by Nancy Friday
Curses, Hexes and Spells by Daniel Cohen
Jack by A.M. Homes
Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo A. Anaya
Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle
Carrie by Stephen King
Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume
On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer
Arizona Kid by Ron Koertge
Family Secrets by Norma Klein
Mommy Laid An Egg by Babette Cole
The Dead Zone by Stephen King
The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
Always Running by Luis Rodriguez
Private Parts by Howard Stern
Where’s Waldo? by Martin Hanford
Summer of My German Soldier by Bette Greene
Little Black Sambo by Helen Bannerman
Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
Running Loose by Chris Crutcher
Sex Education by Jenny Davis
The Drowning of Stephen Jones by Bette Greene
Girls and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell
View from the Cherry Tree by Willo Davis Roberts
The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Keatley Snyder
The Terrorist by Caroline Cooney
Jump Ship to Freedom by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier

Haaaaaappy Birthday to you! Ha-ppy Birthday to you! Happy Biiiirrrthdaay dear Dad, Casey, Stephanie, Irene, Sam, Allison, and Britney-yyy! (rit.) Haaaaaappy Biiiirrrrrirthdaaaaay toooooo yoooooooou!

(Did I miss anyone for the month of April?)

I've been nocturnal these past couple of days, and I enjoy it. Most everyone's asleep.

But I'm getting lonely, so I think I'll go back to sleeping during the night.

I finally went to the Yankee Candle Co. today and got some Granny Smith tea lights, a car air-freshener in Macintosh, and traded in my cracked votive holder for a new one. Their scents are realistic and not overpowering -- unless, of course you're in the store -- I strongly recommend going there for gifts. I'm thinking of getting my mother something in Fresh Cut Roses for Mother's Day.

(Granny Smith tea light with Clear Glass votive holder)

Bluebonnet (Lupinus texensis )

Evening Primrose (Oenothera speciosa)

Verbena (Verbena rigida)

Blue-eyed Grass (Sisyrinchium sp. iridaceae)

Happy Earth Day from San Antonio

"Habemus papam."

I am worth $1,820,580.00 on HumanForSale.com

You're a master at intimate conversation and verbal enticement. You seduce with words, by getting people to open up to you. By establishing this deep connection quickly, people feel under your power ... and then you've got them exactly where you want them!

What Is Your Seduction Style?
Brought to you by BlogThings

Julia's Aliases:

Your movie star name is Sandwich Tsukasa

Your fashion designer name is Yue Amsterdam

Your socialite name is Julia Gulia New York City

Your fly girl / guy name is Y Mat

Your detective name is Cast Klein

Your barfly name is Cheetos Pina Colada

Your soap opera name is Julia Winchmore Hill

Your rock star name is Caramel Cheetah

Your star wars name is Yuemai Matphi

Your punk rock band name is The Depressed UFO

The Amazing Meganame Generator
Brought to you by BlogThings

I just came back from a walk to the BBQ pits to burn some paper coasters. Watching flames is strangely calming.

Your Linguistic Profile:

60% General American English

25% Yankee

15% Dixie

0% Midwestern

0% Upper Midwestern

What Kind of English Do You Speak?
Brought to you by BlogThings

I've neglected to tell you, dear readers, that Toddjuardo is taking me to prom. Before you start thinking "Aww, he asked her to go with him," I must admit that that is not the case. I pressured him to go (which he had no plans of doing) with me (because I forgot to try the chocolate-covered strawberries last year) on pain of death (but don't tell him ... that was in the fine-print).

You should be proud of him, though: He chose his own tux on his own.

Haha, he thinks that was harder than choosing a girl's prom attire.

Normally, I would pass anything Maddox says as humor and not give it a backward glance, but this was not just a humorous/satirical piece. I know (secondhand) that Orbitz has a lousy website, rude customer service, inaccurate information, and false advertisements -- for the first time, he has something with which I could almost empathize.

Resquiescat in pace Pope John Paul II, 84

RIP Mitch Hedberg, 37